Happy Inconveniences
Plus, dolphins and perimenopause!
A couple of months ago, I started to see the word convenience as the double-edged sword it is--short term reward with long term costs. I thought about this from an environmental lens. You know, the convenient take-out meal that comes packaged in multiple plastic containers destined for landfills. Inexpensive clothing sent across the world on polluting cargo ships. Bottled water, a nightmare for environmental and health reasons.
Beware convenience.
And then I came across Kathryn Jezer-Morton’s article about “friction-maxxing” in New York Magazine. She talks about the deeply human costs of convenience. Specifically, the addictive digital tools designed to make life easier. The ones that provide quick dopamine fixes and promises to remove the drudgery from our lives.
Writing humans out of the equation can save time and make processes seamless. But as she points out, friction is the stuff of life. When we remove it, we no longer bump up against humanity. And, yeah, humanity can be annoying and exhausting. I get it! But the less we flex our skills around human interaction, the rustier our people skills get, the more tempted we are to withdraw even further. It’s a vicious cycle.
As Jezer-Morton puts it, “Reading is boring; talking is awkward; moving is tiring; leaving the house is daunting. Thinking is hard. Interacting with strangers is scary. Risking an unexpected reaction from someone isn’t worth it.”
We wind up eliminating agency, too.
A few months prior to Jezer-Morton’s article, Alex Crumi pondered whether convenience might be making our lives more difficult. “Continually choosing the convenient path lessens your ability to deal with unavoidable difficulties.”
Crumi notes that this makes it “easier to get by, but in many ways harder to truly succeed. Human flourishing and happiness is not just about subsistence, but also depends on growth, dynamic problem-solving, and solidarity through hardship.”
In 2026, Jezer-Morton is taking her family along on a journey to friction-max, to embrace the messy unpredictability of human interaction, the simplicity of an analog world, and to accept the tedium of life off of screens and app, as well as delight in the creativity that spurs.
Unplug and make goofy memories!
Ready to give it a try? Tempted by the hope of discovering unexpected gifts for yourself, your family, your community, and the environment?
Maybe this will help. February 25 is National Inconvenience Yourself Day. Go out of your way to brush up against other humans (not literally!), offer a compliment to a stranger, say hi to a neighbor, mail a letter to an old friend.
If you survive that, give International Analog Day a try on February 28, and follow it up by joining me on March 1 for a Miracle Walk in the Woods.
And if all that’s a hit, keep the momentum going for the Global Day of Unplugging on March 7.
Nobody’s telling you to toss your phone or trash your PC, but rather, work to create stretches of times, places, and habits that allow you to live, to thrive, without digital devices.
I’m eager to hear your stories of happy inconveniences.
Hot Flashes are the Talk of the Town
Hot Flashes are here again! There are still tickets available for our first Sunday matinée on February 15 from 3-4:30. We’ll be back at The Storefront in Skokie.
I’ll have tea and discount Valentine’s Day candy for you. You’ll be treated to tales from Cinnamon Cooper, Laurel Crown, Cindy Fey, Sue Garvey, Erica Katz, and, returning to our stage, Victoria Montalbano!
And me! Last week, I was stymied when asked a question on live TV about relating my long-ago experience as a dolphin trainer to perimenopause (um, what?). This week, I’m excited to share 10 things (or maybe just 8) that they (sort of) have in common.
To help you regain your shine, something we can all use during a Midwestern February, my friends from Morton Grove Jewelers will be with us give your rings a free cleaning!
Save Your Seat for Hot Flashes Sunday, Feb.15
Let’s Eat Cookies and Talk About Death
There’s going to be a lot of cookies and death in March. Stories of Life and Love will take place on Wednesday, March 11 thanks to sponsors Mike Dyer, financial advisor with Edward Jones, and Philip Flores, Jr. of Cremation by Water.
This time, the theme will be Lost and Found. Lost loved ones, and found relatives, regained strength, unexpected healing, and, there’s no delicate way to say this, ashes gone astray. It’s going to be great! Get your tickets today.
On March 4, from 6:30-8:30, I’ll be part of a program put on by Chicago Environmentalists highlighting eco-friendly alternatives to traditional burial. I’m not sure about the cookie situation, but the program will take place at Bartleby’s Homemade Ice Cream on Chicago’s North Side, so I’m sure there’ll be something to satisfy every sweet tooth.
Finally, I’m leading a workshop on March 18 on some of the paperwork that surrounds death.
And, of course, give a shout if I can help your family or members of your organization talk about death, end-of-life, disposition options, or grief.
Heartfelt Ceremonies
I’ve designed and facilitated ceremonies to honor and mark a variety of occasions, like
❤️🩹 surviving cancer,
❤️🩹 living past the age of one’s parents, and
🎉 entering life’s third act, AKA croning ceremonies.
💔 Recently, I led my first divorce ceremony. We celebrated the honoree’s resilience and growth through a challenging transition. The gathering didn’t mark the end of healing, but rather a milestone reached with the love and support of dear friends who walked the rocky path alongside her.
It’s an honor to help craft these important, deeply personal gatherings. If you or someone you care about could benefit from a custom ceremony to mark or honor a life event, please reach out.
All Write!
I’m delighted to be back in The Writing Room with Stephanie Rogers and the fabulous students in her popular virtual writing workshop. I’ll be kicking off the Spring session for the Wednesday cohort on March 4 and the Friday group on March 6.
Until Next Time
You can do it! A musical pep talk.
But before you unplug, check out this unique art made from bird observation data. Oooh, and one more reason to step outside! This weekend is the Great Global Backyard Bird Count, a long-running citizen science project.
Speaking of birds, if you’ve ever dreamt, nay, said out loud that you want to make friends with a crow, please reach out to me.
Missed the February newsletter? Read it here.
Scrappy Affirmations normalizes being human in a complicated world. We help you build resilience and find your mid-life mojo through creative workshops, transformative coaching, heartfelt ceremonies, and essential end-of-life planning.